


Um? Great Comet headcanons/drabbles

by Kuraagins



Category: Natasha Pierre and the Great Comet of 1812 - Malloy, Voyná i mir | War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy
Genre: Drabbles, F/F, M/M, Multi, headcanons, tags added as i go along
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-13
Updated: 2017-11-30
Packaged: 2019-01-16 22:02:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12351420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kuraagins/pseuds/Kuraagins
Summary: What up its tumblr user Kuraagins and here are all my bad headcanons and drabbles





	1. Danatole YouTube AU (I'm sorry)

They have a prank channel   
Because OF COURSE they fucking do   
It starts off with Dolokhov being like "let's prank Pierre and put it on the Internet"  
And Anatole comes up with a MASTER PLAN of putting a piece of paper that says some dumb shit like "ur gay" in one of his books.   
They film Pierre opening the book and he's just like "??????? Okay???????"   
But these two fucking assholes think it's the funniest thing, and they do that laugh that prank channels do where they just scream into the camera.   
And pretty much immediately they start to get a following   
(Because they're two attractive guys on the Internet the teenagers can SHIP THEM)   
So they just do more dumb shit to Pierre (and occasionally Ippolyte and Hélène if they're around and in good enough moods that they won't kill them)   
Balaga helps them out sometimes   
And their YouTube channel starts to get pretty big  
Anatole decides to start streaming as well because he likes video games (and also attention)   
So one time on a stream Hélène comes in and is like "tolya you should make out with Dolokhov for a prank"   
Because the girl KNOWS her brother is lowkey gay for his bff  
And Anatole is like "IM NOT GAY IM NOT GONNA KISS A DUDE I LIKE WOMEN"   
But also everyone in the chat is like YOU SHOULD KISS HIM  
Because like I said... The internet Ship Them   
Anatole is a slut for views and attention so he's like "WOW guys I can't BELIEVE you're MAKING me do this y'all are CRAZY, kissing boys is GROSS"   
And he just grabs the camera goes into Dolokhov's room (because I just decided that they live together in this au) and MAKES OUT WITH HIM   
Like.... Not a little peck on the cheek like Hélène was expecting   
There's like tongue and everything   
Anatole pulls away and they both go super red because they're both so in love with each other but they can't even admit it to themselves let alone each other   
And Dolokhov is sat there completely dazed   
And Anatole gets super scared that Dolokhov is gonna get mad at him (because his dad maybe used accuse Anatole of being gay because our boy loves his fashion, which is why he tries to repress his feelings for Fedya???)   
So he just thrusts the camera in his face and is like "HA ITS A PRANK BRO I GOT U NO HOMO" and runs out the room flustered as hell  
Dolokhov is just left sitting there like "yes this is fine..... I am 100% okay that my best friend-and long time crush-has just made out with me as a prank"  
Everyone in the stream chat is going crazy   
Hélène is Shook   
Anatole promptly ends the stream early with some weak ass excuse like "oh suddenly I am very sick goodbye"   
He begins to regret kissing Fedya because MAYBE HE HATES ANATOLE NOW  
But it does get them more followers so...  
And now there's thousands of fanfictions about them   
Anatole googles himself because of course he does and shortly after The Incident he finds some 'danatole' fanfiction  
And he's like what is this danatole they speak of  
He reads a couple(hundred) and is like HOLY SHIT I WISH THIS WAS REAL LIFE  
It's Balaga that comes up with idea of a fake feud   
"It'll get you a fuckton of views Anatole. A fuckton."   
Both Anatole and Fedya love the views   
So Balaga writes diss tracks for them both and gives them ideas for some vague tweets   
"Can u believe some people just won't stop talking about their foot fetish smh"   
"When someone u care about takes ur sister out to the opera instead of u #ratsthesedays"   
(I KNOW 'rats these days' is a very northern British thing but PLEASE guys I find it so funny thinking of Anatole saying it)   
And then they release the diss tracks   
Millions of views   
Everyone is choosing sides   
There's 'team Anatole' and 'team Dolokhov' merch   
Anatole calls his fans the 'Anatole kuragin-ers'  
Dolokhov calls his fans something even dumber like "tHE FIERCE SQUAD"   
"Anyway fierce squad don't forget to like comment and subscribe and dab on those haters like Anatole kuragin"   
So then Anatole takes it a Step Too Far   
And he tweets something like "lol I bet @crazygoodshot was totally into that time I kissed him as a prank #DoesFedyaDolokhovIsGay?"   
(Anatole is an obnoxious hashtag user fight me)   
About 5-10 minutes later he walks in on Dolokhov SOBBING   
And Anatole freaks out   
It takes him like a good forty five minutes to calm him down because Dolokhov is genuinely devastated   
He thinks that Anatole knows he's gay and is in love with him and that he hates him for it   
Eventually Anatole calms him down enough so that Fedya can speak and all he can get out is "do you HATE me Tolya" before breaking down into sobs again   
Anatole is heartbroken that HE'S done this to Dolokhov so he deletes the tweet and once Dolokhov no longer has any more tears to cry they Anatole takes him out for coffee   
Buys a drink and a cake for him to try and make up for what he's done   
All Dolokhov can do is stare blankly at the table   
He's a whole mix of emotions   
He's angry that Anatole would out him like that, upset that his friend clearly dislikes him for enjoying the kiss, confused as to why he would tweet that out because this was just supposed to be a bit of harmless fun for the Views  
Anatole tries to apologise but there's nothing he can say that makes Dolokhov feel better   
They sit in silence for over an hour and Anatole ends up blurting out "I love you"   
And Dolokhov looks up for the first time in confusion and Anatole looks at him and says "I'm in love with you Fedya"   
And Anatole gets all shy and flustered because he finally told Dolokhov about this crush that he'd bottled up for years  
Poor Dolokhov still doesn't get it he's like "love me in like,,,,, a friend way?"   
NO YOU FOOL HE LIKE LIKES YOU   
And once Fedya has come to terms with this after Anatole has gone on some big ramble about how beautiful he finds him  
Fedya confesses his love for Anatole   
And they spend the rest of the day holding hands and doing cute couple stuff!!!!  
Someone sees them and posts a picture of them holding hands and I'd like "are danatole really feuding????"   
And then the eye emoji about 10 times   
The picture goes VIRAL   
Anatole and Fedya make a video a couple of weeks later explains that the feud is over (they're both too proud to admit it was all fake tho) and now they're dating and in love!!  
And then everyone writes Dan and Phil-esque fanfiction about them BYE


	2. Marya/Hélène - injury

"Marya, you're bleeding," Hélène notes in shock as she enters the kitchen. 

"It's nothing, Elena," Marya hisses with pain, clutching at her bleeding hand. 

Hélène walks swiftly across the room to her girlfriend, she places one hand soothingly on Marya's back and the other delicately lifts and inspects the cut hand. 

"There there my love, let me find you a bandage and wrap your thumb up," Hélène coos. 

"Honestly Hélène I'm perfectly fine," Marya protests weakly as Hélène presses a quick kiss to her neck before hurrying over to the other side of the kitchen. 

"I'm sure that's nonsense," she states, pulling up a stool to reach the top shelf, "you look as pale as your Sonya the time she walked in on me half dressed," 

Hélène rummages around in the medicine basket on the top shelf for a moment until she triumphantly pulls out a bandage. Rushing back to Marya, the younger woman led her girlfriend towards the tap to clean off the blood before gingerly wrapping the bandage around the cut. 

Guiding the other woman onto the sofa ("you must rest now, lover," Hélène had demanded) she took the opportunity to curl into her girlfriend's side and wrap her arms protectively around her torso. Marya smiled softly, and put her non injured hand around Hélène's shoulder. They sat like that for a little while until Hélène shuffled closer to press kisses to Marya's face- unable to keep herself so restrained any longer. 

"How on earth did you manage to cut yourself like that, angel?" Hélène murmurs against Marya's jaw.

"I was preparing dinner for you. You will let me finish later on won't you?"

"Nonsense! You're injured darling. We'll order in something, hm?" Hélène purrs, with that typical Kuragin stubbornness. 

"It's a small cut my love, nothing to worry over," Marya insists. 

"Oh come now, won't you let me take care of you? There are so few opportunities for me to do so and you know I adore... Taking care of you," Hélène grins and drawls out the last part of her sentence suggestively. 

"I'll have none of that," Marya chides fondly, "but whatever you wish, my Elena. And you can start by bringing me a cup of tea," 

"Of course my dearest Marya," Hélène laughs, reentering the kitchen to make her girlfriend the tea. 

Upon her return, she gently sets the cup down on the nearby table and retakes her position curled up against her wonderful Marya, who places a kiss on her forehead in thanks. 

"You can decide what we eat tonight," Hélène says, "and because I'm so incredibly kind you can choose what we put on TV too, my love,"

"How generous," Marya drawls- amused nevertheless. 

"But of course, darling Marya. I will do anything to take care of you."


	3. Marya/Hélène - first date

They go to a fancy restaurant that's about an hours drive from Hélène's apartment. It's Marya's pick but she doesn't mind. After all they're both used to such high class places because of their upbringing. 

Both of them are dresses to the nines- eager to impress. Although Hélène was definitely showing considerably more skin than her partner in her glittering green dress.

As they walk up to the entrance, Marya loops her arm around Hélène's, who looks to the side and smiles privately, thrilled at the contact between them. She thinks to herself that she wouldn't care if Marya had taken her to the most run down place in the whole world, so long as they were together. In her eyes, the woman could do no wrong. 

Inside the restaurant, the couple are tended to and shown to a table immediately. With both of them having rather high class upbringings they often held themselves with an air of importance, which helped greatly in getting them what they wanted, especially around strangers. Marya in particular had a rather fearsome look about her. A look that you don't want to disappoint in fear for your life. Hélène found that look exceedingly attractive. 

With Marya's arm still linked with Hélène's, the pair inevitable get some stares as they're led to their table. 'Of course,' Hélène thinks, 'this place is so high brow, the patrons probably aren't used to seeing women dining together in our context,' 

She feels a little embarrassed, but it takes a lot more than some pathetic stares to scare off a Kuragin. And with Marya at her side, she feels powerful. There is no doubt in her mind that the older woman would fight anyone who dared to challenge either of them on this night. 

They eat their dinner mostly in silence. Occasionally the odd compliment comes out of one of them or the other ("your hair looks particularly beautiful tonight, dear Marya," and "those pearls suit you very nicely, Elena,") but nerves were suffocating the both of them. Which was odd, because they had spoken plenty of times with each other in the past. And yet, here they were, unable to find the right words for each other. Although, the atmosphere of the place was so constricting. People hardly speaking above a murmur across tables, quieter even than the clinking of cutlery against plates. Marya and Hélène are both such outspoken and loud individuals, their sort of talk probably didn't belong in a place like this. 

During dessert, Marya stares at Hélène, the latter of which flushes and looks down. Was there something wrong with her face? 

Marya leans forward and in one swift movement tilts up Hélène's head and swipes her thumb across her nose. Hélène sits passively in puzzlement until she sees the cream from her dessert on Marya's thumb. 

"Oh!" She exclaimed with a laugh. 

The sudden loud noise caused nearby diners to look round irritably, and Hélène gave an awkward cough and a nervous smile to Marya before looking down and finishing her dessert without further comment. 

"Perhaps that wasn't the best place for or first date," Marya reflects sheepishly on the drive back. 

"Never mind that Marya, I had a wonderful evening," Hélène insists, "the food was lovely. And the company even more so," 

Marya laughs quietly. "You look stunning tonight, dear Hélène," 

"And you, sweet Marya," 

"Would you... Would you spend the night with me?" Marya falters, "I would have liked to speak with you more tonight Elena, I don't feel..." 

"Satisfied?" Hélène puts in. 

Marya doesn't respond, but reaches out to brush against Hélène's hand. 

Hélène grasps tightly, and smiles in the darkness.


	4. Marya/Hélène - First kiss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter ended up being a little angsty?? I guess?? It wasn't going to be like this but w/e

Hélène looked a mess. Wearing no makeup and yesterday's clothes; hell she hadn't even washed her hair. 

Marya looked even worse, with bags under her eyes and her brow creased with worry. 

It was no wonder. 

Natasha had only just gotten out of the hospital. Out of danger, but still so weak. The young girl was sleeping in Marya's apartment with her cousin until her parents fly over to take her home. 

"I'm sorry," Hélène chokes out, finally breaking the silence. 

"It's not your fault Hélène," Marya states quietly. 

"I could have done something. I could have said... More." The tears begin to stream down her face. 

"We all know what Anatole is like," is all that Marya responds with.

"I should have stopped him. He shouldn't be able to do whatever he wants just because that's what we all expect of him!" Hélène shouts, angry at herself far more than her brother. "I... I had no idea the extent of what he was planning to do," she finishes quietly. 

Marya doesn't speak. Only keeps her gazed fixed on the far wall, where it had been since Hélène arrived. 

"I'll leave you all alone. I don't want my presence to cause any upset. Will you... Will you give Natasha these?" She pulls out her pearl necklace and presses it into Marya's hand as she stands to leave. 

"Your pearls?" Marya whispers, "but you love these Hélène,"

"Natasha always admired them. She deserves them more than I do. Please Marya, tell her I'm sorry," Hélène keeps her gaze trained on the floor as she walks towards the front door of Marya's apartment. 

"Hélène," 

She stops in her tracks at Marya's clear tone and her hand clutching hers. 

Hélène turns to face Marya.

"Stay?" The older woman asks, so fragile and feeble, tears now beginning to trickle down her face. 

"If that is what you wish, dearest Marya," Hélène replies softly. 

"Thank you," Marya whispers, and cups Hélène's face with her hand and kisses her. 

It's a hard kiss, a kiss of so much internalised sorrow and anger. Anger at Anatole and his stupid plans yes, but mostly Marya was angry at herself. She didn't notice, she didn't care. She could have done something. 

She suddenly breaks the kiss and stumbles back awkwardly. 

"I- I shouldn't have done that without asking you," Marya apologises.

"Marya, it's alright," Hélène soothes, stepping forward towards her and holding her hand. 

"I just can't... Can't be alone with the girls Hélène. They're so sad, it's destroying me," she sobs. 

"My wonderful Marya," Hélène murmurs, "I'll stay with you as long as you want me here. I promise you we'll make things right," 

And they kiss again.


	5. Danatole - bathing together

-They actually have a routine of this  
-Every Sunday evening they take a bath or a shower together   
-the first time Anatole suggests it it's been a hard day and he does NOT want to be left alone   
-Dolokhov insists that there's no way they'll both be able to fit in but he can't say no to Anatole   
-they have a very small apartment and the bathroom is no different   
-and he's right   
-there is no space   
-they're squashed and its cramped and there is no room for movement   
-but Anatole is smiling and content so Dolokhov bares with it   
-and its not actually as bad as he thinks it will be  
-they spend a good hour just holding each other in the water   
-and kissing  
-there's a lot of that   
-and Anatole enjoys it so much that he shyly asks Dolokhov to bathe with him again the next week.   
-of course he says yes  
-so it becomes they're routine   
-Anatole always puts a shit ton of bubble bath/bath bombs or that kind of stuff in   
-he probably goes to lush at least once a week lbr  
-one time he gets a tea tree oil body wash and Fedya has a rash for like a week after  
-so that's how they find out Fedya is allergic to tea tree  
-Anatole feels AWFUL  
-but Dolokhov literally does not care because he Loves Anatole and knows it was just an accident   
-ALSO they wash each other's hair   
-and at first Dolokhov is very Confused because Anatole has about 8 different shampoos and he doesn't actually know how to use conditioner because he's never used it himself   
-like... Is there a different way to put it on than shampoo?   
-He just kind of stares blankly at the bottles on the shelf, trying to figure out which one he should use   
-Anatole laughs and teaches him which ones he uses and in which order   
-that sort of stuff   
-within a few weeks Dolokhov knows exactly how to do Anatole's hair   
-he also googles how to do that fancy head massage thing that hairdressers do   
-the first time he tries it out on Anatole the boy literally squeals   
-like... He's surprised and a little ticklish but Dolokhov is shockingly good at That.   
-Quite a few months into this routine Anatole invites Fedya to spend the summer at the kuragin holiday home   
-not wanting to break from their routine Anatole insists that they bathe together whilst staying there.  
-Fedya is Very Hesitant because the rest of the kuragin family are staying there too   
-Hélène already knows him but he wants the rest Anatole's family to like him so bad   
-but like I said, he can't deny Anatole anything.   
-now, the kuragin's are rich af so their holiday home is huge   
-subsequently, so is their bathroom   
-needless to say....... They spend a lot more time than usual in there.....,  
-Fedya is super embarrassed but convinces himself no one heard   
-they did lmao  
-Ippolyte and Hélène don't particularly care but like..... Do Not want to have to put up with their shit for the rest of the summer   
-it probably takes Fedya a very long time to look anyone in the eye after this   
-anyway I'm going to stop now these are so bad ytgjhcghjbhgv


	6. Danatole dream world AU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is kinda weird and I have no idea whether it'll make sense?? Oh well hope you like it anyway

Dolokhov gets nightmares   
Every night, without fail  
He never remembers what they're about but he wakes up sweating and crying and frightened  
It's bad one night   
There's figures surrounding him, they have knives, he can't move, he can't move, he can't move  
"Of course you can move"   
He hears the voice but he can't comprehend where it's coming from  
"I Can't!" He sobs  
"It's your dream," the voice tells him, as a gentle hand grasps Dolokhov's wrist and coaxes him forward   
He can move   
Dolokhov takes two steps forward and looks around  
There's no figures with knives  
Only a man   
He's beautiful   
The man tells Dolokhov his name is Anatole   
Anatole tells Dolokhov that his dreams don't always have to be frightening, he teaches Dolokhov how to fly   
When he wakes up, for once Dolokhov doesn't feel scared   
He doesn't remember what he dreamed about, but it leaves him feeling light and happy all day   
The next night it's raining in his dream   
It's pounding into his skin, his hair and clothes sticking to him uncomfortably   
The map he's holding is getting more and more blurred and he doesn't know where he's going   
Where is he going?   
There's people with black umbrellas jostling into him constantly   
He can't breathe   
Someone snatches the map off him   
No no he needs that   
Where is he going he needs to get away from here   
"here, you need this more than I do"   
A man hands him a blue umbrella   
The eyes... the hair...   
He looks so familiar to Dolokhov but he just can't put his finger on it   
"Do I know you?" He asks, "I remember... that smile"   
Anatole grins and takes Dolokhov's hand and they walk   
The rest of the dream they just talk, and Dolokhov feels closer to this man than he's ever felt to anyone in the real world   
Anatole has never met a human like Fedya before. He's interesting and funny and not to mention damn handsome   
This time when Dolokhov wakes up, he remembers a face  
They meet up every night and of course they fall in love   
The first time they kiss, it's during a starlight picnic that Anatole has created for him  
Hélène knows Anatole is falling in love with a dreamer  
He's her brother, how could she not notice?   
"It's just a bit of harmless fun" he shrugs   
"It better be," she snaps, but she knows it's gone too far already.   
She reminds Anatole that he really shouldn't be messing with other people's dreamers, let alone Pierre's.   
"Look at what happened when you messed with his other dreamer, that Natasha"  
But Anatole assures his sister he had learned from that experience and that this was completely different  
What Anatole doesn't tell her that it's different because he's genuinely in love with Dolokhov.  
He argues that Pierre's horrible at creating dreams too. All the man knows how to do is to make things scary and anxiety inducing  
As time goes on it's difficult to find Dolokhov awake  
He sleeps from the moment he gets back from school to the very last minute before he has to leave  
Even during the school day, he naps at the back of class, in the corner of the field at lunch break, anything to spend time with Anatole   
He gets sleeping pills off Balaga, who thinks nothing of it  
He's sold Fedya drugs before, what would be the problem here?   
One night Anatole decides to ask Dolokhov to stay in the dream world  
"You told me yourself your sister doesn't like me being here" Fedya murmurs  
"I don't care, you're all that matters to me, they could exile me for all I care I just want to be with you"  
"I want to anatole, I really do but... it's so hard for me to keep sleeping like this"   
The sound of Dolokhov's alarm blares in their ears, penetrating into the dream world   
"Don't go," Anatole begs  
"I don't want to!" Dolokhov insists  
His body twitches and anatole grabs onto his arms to try and keep him awake   
Eventually Dolohov's body collapses in the dream world as he wakes up.   
"I hope you can hear me... I love you" Anatole whispers to Fedya's unmoving body.   
Hélène hears   
Her brother is in love with a fucking dreamer  
She doesn't know what to do, but for Anatole's sake she knows she needs to put a stop to this.   
The only person she knows who to go to that could help is their father   
Vasily Kuragin is the head of the dream world and has ultimate power   
It hurts Hélène to tell their father Anatole's secret but it's for the best of everyone   
Vasily is furious and confronts his son   
"It's nothing serious father I swear! It's just a bit of harmless fun!" Anatole sobs   
It's not   
Vasily can fucking see his son breaking down in front of him, he's not blind   
"Stop messing with that dreamer of you'll be exiled" is all he says before leaving.   
Fedya, meanwhile, can't do this anymore.   
His grades are slipping, his friends ignoring him and his father has just admitted that he's cheating on his mother with his secretary.   
He doesn't want to be awake anymore   
He wants to be with Anatole   
The sleeping pills...  
The sleeping pills.   
Fedya arrives and Anatole is flustered and distracted   
"You have to leave, Fedya" Anatole begs him desperately   
He knows if Fedya stays here his father will hurt him too  
"I... I can't!" Fedya tells him, "I thought you wanted this?"   
Anatole cries and kisses him and kisses him and kisses him   
They find Anatole crying in the arms of a dreamer when they come to take him to the council for his crimes.   
Dolokhov screams as they drag Anatole away from him   
"Please don't hurt him!" He screeches and Anatole breaks free to kiss Fedya one last time before he's grabbed again and pulled away   
They throw him at the feet of his father, with everyone else surrounding to vote on Anatole's fate   
It has to be unanimous for him to be exiled.   
Hélène, oh Hélène   
She's crying and she can barely bring herself to raise her hand but her father shouts and with a choked sob she raises a shaky arm   
And as quick as that he's exiled   
You have to understand, exiling in this world doesn't mean being sent somewhere else   
As quick as that Anatole just... Ceases to exist   
After the exile Dolokhov wanders around the dream world aimlessly. What can be do now? Without Anatole?   
But at least he isn't awake   
"Why are you still here?" A girl asks, as he sits atop a cliff   
It's Hélène, Anatole's sister  
And Fedya can tell that it's her because Anatole, his Anatole, was able to describe things so beautifully and vividly   
What can he say to her? Her brother is gone because of him   
"This place is beautiful," is all he can come up with   
"Beautiful?" She asks, "how can this place be beautiful when my brother is gone and you're still here for some reason?"   
"I'm sorry I-"  
Hélène stalks forward and seizes Dolokhov, tilting him so he's hovering over the edge   
He screams and protests but all Hélène does is hiss in his ear   
"For Anatole,"   
And pushes him, hard.   
Fedya waked up in the hospital, surrounded by his family   
It takes time  
A lot of time   
But Fedya heals   
And Fedya forgets about Anatole and the dream world.   
He starts college.   
Balaga is there too so it's nice to have a familiar face after all he's been through   
It's raining on his first day of classes, and Fedya clutches his umbrella, a blue one he bought not long after he got out of hospital   
He sees a man out of the corner of his eye   
Tall, with platinum blonde hair   
Without realising it Fedya starts to walk towards him   
He starts to remember   
The dream world   
Hélène   
The exile   
Anatole   
He starts to run, even though it can't possibly be true because Anatole doesn't exist anymore   
He smacks into the man's arm in his haste   
"Oh I'm sorry," he says as he turns around   
And against all the odds   
It's him  
Anatole falters "do- do I know you? I remember... That smile"   
Fedya grins wider and thrusts his umbrella towards the other man   
"Here, you need this more than I do,"   
And he knows. Everything will be okay.

**Author's Note:**

> Send me requests if you want they clear my skin and cure my depression


End file.
